I just read that someone in New York City gets stabbed every 60 seconds. When does a joke become a dad joke? When it departs and never comes back.Ī priest asks the convicted murderer at the electric chair, “Do you have any last requests?” “Yes,” replies the murderer. So I packed up all of my things and right… I mean left… My wife is mad that I have no sense of direction. Set him on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life. Give a man a match, and he’ll be warm for a few hours. I find it weird how many people take knives with them on outings. When I see the names of lovers engraved on a tree, I don’t find it cute or romantic. Want to know how you make any salad into a caesar salad? Stab it twenty-three times. If I had known the difference between the words “antidote” and “anecdote,” one of my best friends would still be alive. It’s important to establish a good vocabulary. Why did the person miss today’s funeral? Because he definitely wasn’t a mourning person.

His last wish was, to be Frank in Stein.ĭo you know the phrase “One man’s trash is another man’s treasure”? That’s how I realized I was adopted. When my Uncle Frank died, he wanted his cremations to be buried in his favorite beer mug. I decided to kick him out since I hate visitors. I visited my new friend in his apartment. Come to think of it, maybe they should have called the movie “Finding Dad!” We didn’t realize that was her blood type until it was too late. As she died, she kept telling us to “be positive,” but it’s hard without her. My mom died when we couldn’t remember her blood type. He chopped it down and shouted, “You will dialogue!” The man entered a spooky forest to converse with a speaking tree. They make me laugh when they fall down the stairs and hurt themselves. Then I remembered why I was digging in the first place. I wanted to run straight home to tell my wife about it. I was digging in our garden and found a chest full of gold coins. She exclaimed, “Can I depend on you for anything?!”Īs I get older, I remember all the people I lost along the way. His wife grew frustrated as she changed out of her funeral outfit. I hate technology.Ī man wakes from a coma. It activated the front camera, and hurt my feelings. I just asked my Siri, “Why am I still single?”. There is a big Mexican party tonight… And everyJuan is going. We have a few hilarious ones on this page. The Juan jokes are some of the next Mexican jokes. Then we boil it.” The inspector keeps digging: “And after that?” The general responds: “Well… just to be cautious, we just drink vodka.”Īnd finally a couple of edgy Mexican jokes. The general responds: “Well, first, we filter it. The inspector asks a general: “How do you prepare drinking water?”. Putin heard that many Russian soldiers are getting sick in Ukraine, so he sends a health inspector to join the Russian army to improve its sanitary conditions.People were stuck on the escalator for HOURS! In Poland’s largest mall there was a terrible power outage.“Don’t laugh” he responded: “you’re next!” Leon the Polish man came home early from work one day, and walked into his bedroom to see that his best friend was in bed with his wife! He was so angry and feeling depressed that he pulled out his gun and put it to his head.Let’s move on now to edgy Polish jokes & Russian jokes… remember that these jokes are meant to be good fun… I tried to stay respectful because ultimately I love Poland and my Polish friends and family too much. Why doesn’t China have a cricket team? Because they eat the bat. That one awkward moment you have to go ask your Chinese neighbor if they’ve seen your dog. I think I banged a Chinese celebrity… She kept screaming “I’m Wei Tu Yung”. What do you call a Chinese man in the summer heat? Boi Ling. What do you call a surprised Chinese man? Ho Lee Fuk. Let’s start with some of the edgiest Chinese jokes: The man responds: “Well, could you please wash your hands? I would like a cheeseburger.”Ī: They are trying to keep their ankles warm. “Yes” responds the blonde very suggestively. He asks the gorgeous woman working in the truck “are you the one doing the handj*bs”. The first one is that someone said I’m a better cook than you”īutler: “The second reason is that I make love better than you”ĭad: “ok… how much more money do you want?” Edgy Blonde JokesĪ man goes to a food truck and sees the menu: The dad asks:”Why would I even give you a raise?”īutler: “There are two reasons. In a wealthy family, the butler asks the dad for a raise. None: you don’t know how many inches you’ll get, when he’s coming, or how long it will stay. What’s the difference between a man and a snowstorm? Which bedtime activity position will result in the worst kids? Well, just ask your mother.ĩ out of 10 people agree: a gang r*pe is fun.

Minion memes edgy